Life is so Toughon the Road........

For whatever reason it was get logs for the truck day (what ever you do, don’t call it a bus, the driver ‘Big Jim’ will chew your nuts off). So as we gathered at dawn, in groups of 5 and marked off. We were sent off to the dark woods to gather dry wood for our bush camps. Now I’m no boy scout and I‘m on holiday right? So Stevie figured no way man and blagged it out when we had to display our separate wood piles. CJ the burly Para trooper came marching past and stopped in front of me. A noise so high came out of CJ’s mouth the like of which I’ve seldom heard. Stevie was in blooming big trouble.......eek! “What do you call this”? Squeaked the high pitched CJ. “Erm wood sir” I meekly replied. So, as my pile of wood was the smallest I was locked in the back locker through my journey from Romania to Bulgaria and fed only stale bread and warm water as an incentive to others to ensure anyone’s lack lustre efforts are not repeated. Only kidding folks, but wood is gathered for the truck but normally as part of a pee stop.

Well folks, we arrived in very sunny Bulgaria today and when we arrived at the camp were offered some very serious choices to make. Life really is tough on the road you see. A full roast beef dinner and large cooked English breakfast or not......well it didn’t take me long to make up my mind I can tell you ha ha.

So yesterday we spent the day in Bucharest Romania, wondering around and seeing all the major sites and it looks like this big place is pulling its skirts up, lots of work everywhere and its really cheap here too. So Danish pastry and a double espresso for mid morning coffee off we went. It’s actually quite flat and tourists still seem to be a matter of curiosity or that just what I’m wearing.....maybe I need to look in a mirror in the morning ha.

So the streets are getting narrower and the area is looking much older looking with the sound of old barrow music drifting through the streets. We come across a guy looking like Charlie Chaplin who is grinding the old organ. His big top hat has two white mice running around the top and he has three parakeets on a perch in front of him. It’s some kind of fortune telling thing. So one of the group pays this guy, he picks a mouse up which promptly pulls out a fortune card in English......outstanding or what!!

Anyway, we are staying at this fab campsite for a couple of days, laundry is being taken care of by the very nice camp staff and my only concern is which type of beer to sup next. Like I said life really is tough on the road.........

Day 10

The day started with a nit parade. Living in such close proximity with 22 fellow travellers means that checks have to be carried out on a regular basis. So we all lined up to attention outside of our tents as CJ the ex SAS Para trooper (remember him and nope we still haven’t seen the whites of his eyes yet) and font of all travel knowledge and he speaks many, many languages went through our hair with a fine tooth comb. As you know I don’t have a lot of hair on the top and luckily none were found or it would have been the back locker for me and solitary......only kidding folks.

To be fair to both CJ and Jim, they are two of the most relaxed guys and have a way that ensures you get the best out of the trip. Have incredible worldly knowledge, have many years of overland travel and have an answer to any query. This truly is going to be a fantastic trip, thanks guys.

So the days are rolling alone really quickly, everyone has settled in the groove, we can all cook up some really good grub each evening and time is passing so quickly I rarely know what day it is. We are through another time zone again and will pass through many others I guess. We have just arrived in Romania and the famous Transylvanian town that I can’t pronounce hah hah (do that in a Dracula voice for effect).

We have been blessed with superb weather and all of us are getting a nice tan. So I can knock off many place names like Turda Gorge (no really), Budapest and many others, we also saw a coach with passengers sailing up a river – very bizarre! Which means I should keep a diary so I can add more detail for you good folks back home in Blighty.



We are about to head off into the town for a meal later tonight and I need a beer but I’m still wearing my four day old undies and funnily enough those nasty flies that have been biting me are all gone.........maybe I should change my under crackers for the guys I’m sleeping with tonight or I may find I’m sleeping in the hall way ha ha.

We're off and running

Day six.
Well here we are Peeps, I thought it was about time that I let you good folks from Blighty know what we are up to. We had to run the gauntlet of the London Marathon to get out of town, catch a fast ferry to Calais and then drive to Tournai in Belgium for our first night stop.

Our crew CJ and Jim (two burly hard nuts that can curdle milk at a thousand paces) keep us in good order thus ensuring you enjoy yourself erm.......whether you want to or not. These guys are both ex SAS Para troopers, wear shades all the time so you never see the whites of their eyes, sleep hanging upside down and have the look that with just one stab of a little finger in the correct place will ensure you die a horrible death very slowly.

Anyway, after the second morning of aerobics at 5am which is compulsory (apparently), ensures we are all fit enough for some of the more strenuous parts of the trip. Now I’m no spring chicken and can’t see the need for practicing a military field gun race, parading with towels and wash bags each morning in our undies or folding sleeping bags by numbers for what is supposed to be a holiday............but hey ho!

Only kidding folks. CJ and Jim are two smashing blokes who have masses of overland travel experience, very patient and are looking after all of us very well. We all have jobs to do which change four times during the trip, so this leg myself and three others get all the bags off and put them all back again which happens in the morning and each evening. We also have cook duties and I and a different team set up breakfast, prepare a yummy lunch and cook dinner which rotates every five days or so. Cooking is real easy using fresh ingredients and the camp stove wakes out some real heat with some really good chefs already coming to the fore.

The first days travel was uneventful, the crossing smooth and the trip to Belgium didn’t seem to take too long. Our 2nd day we trucked off to Koln or Cologne and walked to three miles to the cathedral or Dom and climbed the 509 steps to the top to get a fantastic view of this fair city. We ate out at a local restaurant, then retired to a bar to saver the great day we have had so far. We are travelled to Bamberg a world heritage city for the night and a day to look at this historic town.

After a days travel we arrived in the Czech Republic still enjoying the great weather, everyone is in the groove and we ate banana pancakes for breakfast. Life just can’t get any better

The Betty Swollocks Debate!

Dear Chums,

There are just four sleeps left before I depart for London and a full backpack dress rehersal was well overdue so the bed was covered in all sorts of holiday bits n bobs, stuff I must take, stuff I might take, stuff I'd like to take if there is room - we've all been there before haven't we? Except this time its not two weeks its 18 fun filled frolicking months away from dear old Blighty.

So off I went, filling up side pockets and new pockets I didnt know I had ending up with the main compartment for clothes. Battening down the hatches and strapping on the bed roll and sleeping bag for good measure I tried to pick this erm..............behemoth of a lump off the floor!! I did evntually get it on my back and buckled up all the straps and staggered to the bathroom to stand on the scales to get an idea of how much by weight the bag and contents were. Bugger me the needle went right round and past the maximum weight indicated on the dial.

Now, there is no way that young Stevie could possibly be the main cause of this sudden increase in overal tonnage so Stevie sought advice from Unky who has a large fishing weigh scales that go up to 20kgs. So, young nephew and Unky found a very stout stick to hold the scales and hooked up the sack. Two grown men, with veins straining in their necks, slowly manage to defeat gravity and get the bag off the ground. Looking at the dial, it showed the bag to weigh more than 20kgs......feek!

What to take out, and how much? This is the dilema I found my self in.....Laying everything back on the beg, double bottles of shower gel, sun cream, toothpaste and the like were the first to go closley followed by that third pair of jeans and thick tops and tee shirts. Things are getting serious now as I get down to under crackers and socks.

To be honest dear readers I do like to put on clean nicks and socks everyday, sometimes if I'm feeling very decadent I'll shower and change during the day and put on more fresh ones. I don't even know how many pairs of apple catchers I own but it probably runs to thirty or forty pairs. For this trip I thought I might take just five pairs of quite loose boxers which could double as night wear - don't want to frighten the girls at the site of what looks like a tortoise poking his head out while looking at a couple of walnuts do we? And I also thought the loose fitting might in some way provide the extra ventilation that might be needed when it gets a bit hotter. A pair of betty swollocks can be very uncomfortable as we chaps know, but will just five pairs be enough? Should I wait until they get crunchy before I change or should I count the flies that will be circling in ever larger swarms before I decide to change my under wear. Its now just a few days before I have to make my final decision and quite frankly dear readers I'm starting to lose sleep over this one.............

Not Long Now

I've been biting my nails down to the quick waiting for my passport to come back from Travcour. You see dear chums, one of the Embassies has been closed for no reason what so ever. No matter becouse people far more knowing than I have decided that we can apply for all our visa's in country and my precious passport is back in my hot little hand weehee.

I must say dear readers that I have been feeling very meloncholic of late. You see, two very young people have tragically died recently, James Bubear just nineeen years old, walking home through Bath - a city I love. Where it seems he fell into the river and drowned. Sian O'Callaghan was walking home from a night out at a club in Swindon was also tragically killed, she was just twenty two. Two young lives, with everything to look forward too, just gone..........

How is it that an old crusty like me, gets a second chance at life, can do things most people can only dream about without thought or consideration for anybody else, except him self. Does that seem a little selfish to you? Becouse it seems very odd to me.

The older one gets, the older one realises that this life we lead is not a rehersal, this is it, there is no replay and certainly is not a practise run for something else. I can't change what heppend to James or Sian, or any of the many other young guys and girls that similar things happen to all over the world (I would imagine) but, I can at least ensure that I get as much as I possibly can out of the next eighteen months or so, or I'm not playing life's game properly and to the full.